A lot is said and shared this time of year (February and Valentine's Day) about love and relationships, so I figured I would add my own two cents.  When I think about healthy relationships and the work that a healthy, nurturing relationship requires, I often think about my Dad's reflections and advice concerning this topic.    Dad passed away April 26th, 2010 after forty-seven years of practicing medicine as a Family Pratictioner.    He had a passion for a more general practice of medicine - i.e. Family Practice, etc. - in part because he was an advocate for wholistic treatment, affirming the interrelatedness of body, mind and soul.    Aware of my work as a part time marriage and family therapist, Dad would sometimes share with me about his work with couples (especially pre-marital couples) whom he sometimes counseled at his clinic.   He told me that he would present to them the 3-C's of a nurturing, positive relationship.    I find them to be very helpful, straight-forward, and full of common sense,  although common sense isn't always so common in these times in which we live.
Here are Dad's 3-C's:

Commitment:   Any relationship which hopes to be strong and secure needs trust.    This is the bedrock of any healthy and nurturing relationship.    When a person knows that the other person will be with them through the ups and downs; through good times and bad times...whatever comes their way ....this breeds a security that enables and empowers a love to not only grow, but to blossom, in all its fullness.

Communication:   There is poor communication and there is positive communication.   We communicate ALL the time, no matter what we are doing or saying.   Here we are speaking, of course, of positive communication.     Positive communication consists of two general headings/practices:   Active listening and assertive sharing.     In active listening we not only hear physically (with our ears) but we also seek to listen emotionally (with our heart), that is, we seek to understand what the other person's words and body language are saying.  To do this we ask a lot of questions.   We inquire of the other person for clarification and explanation, staying focused upon them and their sharing....NOT our agenda.    You might try a simple (but difficult) exercise for active listening to another.     Listen to someone share for a few minutes and then repeat back to them what you heard them saying.   This is a great way to stay focused upon their words and their thoughts and feelings.   If you truly practice this you will not be focused upon your thoughts and what you will say in response to their words.   Then there is assertive sharing in order to practice healthy communication.    Assertive sharing is telling the other person for what you wish.   It is expressing your true feelings and thoughts and wishes to another in a non-threatening, non-demanding style.   And, it can avoid a lot of passive-aggressiveness in a relationship, because you are telling it like it is, instread of hiding feelings and thoughts.    Active listening and Assertive sharing are two essentials of positive, healthy communication in a relationship.

Complimentation:    Everyone needs and desires to know that they are valued and appreciated by significant others in their life.     Sharing compliments, whether pertaining to another's physical, mental or emotional attributes/qualities, goes a long way  in nurturing and strengthening a relationship.    Here I would add another quality with a play on words.    Both COMPLIMENTATION and COMPLEMENTATION are necessary for a growing, functional relationship.     While complimentation involves words/expressions of valuing and appreciating another, complementation includes affirmation of, and realizing the need for, variety in a relationship.    The strongest of relationships complement one another, where each person recognizes they have strengths and weaknesses, and that they help balance and support one another when they complement each other.

So, these are Pop's 3'C's, which I find worthy of passing on...and, I hope you find them helpful in all your relationships.  Growing and nurturing healthy relationships is not easy.  There is required work.    But I believe, along with Dad, that commitment, communication and complimentation can provide the tools and the framework that is needed for good, strong relationships.